Some people feel anxious in social situations, such as going on a date, giving a speech, performing in front of an audience, or asking for help in a public place. In such situations, you may feel self-conscious, embarrassed, or have butterflies in your stomach. Being anxious in unfamiliar or uncomfortable situations may seem normal; however, significant anxiety may indicate underlying social anxiety disorder.

What is Social Anxiety?

People with social anxiety disorder have an irrational fear that they are being watched, judged, and fear embarrassment. The anxiety and fear can lead to avoidance, affect your daily routines, school, and work life. It is a chronic health condition, and the person fears being judged, humiliated, or rejected.

They are worried about social engagement even before the actual event and often avoid places or situations that may cause distress. Sometimes anxiety can arise while performing, such as in a sports competition, a debate, or while playing a musical instrument on stage.

How Common is Social Anxiety?

Social anxiety usually begins in childhood or adolescence, and it can persist till later adulthood. One may feel extremely shy and avoid public interactions. It is more common in women than in men, and is also more apparent in adolescence and young adults. Appropriate treatment and support can help people with social anxiety improve their quality of life.

Symptoms of Social Anxiety

When people feel shy or discomfort in certain situations, it is not necessarily social anxiety disorder, especially in children. People have different personality traits, and their comfort levels may vary: some are naturally reserved, while others are outgoing.

However, apart from usual nervousness, anxiety, avoidance, and fear related to social situations, it is different. The signs and symptoms of social anxiety are as follows.

• Emotional and Behavioural Symptoms

The emotional and behavioural symptoms of social anxiety entail fear about situations where you might be judged negatively, constant worry about humiliating or embarrassing yourself. You feel intense fear when interacting with or communicating with strangers. Also, you are afraid that people will notice your anxiousness, sweating, blushing, and having a trembling or shaky voice.

You avoid speaking or performing in front of people due to distress about embarrassment, and avoiding situations where you’re the centre of attention. You expect the worst possible aftermath from a negative social experience.

Children might show temper tantrums, anxiety about interacting with peers, by crying or being clingy to parents, and by refusing to speak or play in social situations.

• Physical Symptoms

The physical symptoms of social anxiety involve blushing, increased heart rate, trembling, upset stomach, or feeling nausea, dizziness, or lightheadedness, and difficulty catching your breath. You may also feel your mind has gone blank and experience muscle tension.

• Avoidance of Social Situations

Every day experiences are difficult to endure when you experience social anxiety, and you might avoid interaction with strangers and going to parties or social gatherings. You often refrain from starting conversations, making eye contact, or going to a room where people are present. Some people also have difficulty returning or exchanging items from a store, or eating in front of other people, or complaining to a waiter/ staff member about any issue with their food.

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How to Overcome Social Anxiety?

You can overcome social anxiety through gradual exposure to your fears, challenge negative thoughts utilizing CBT techniques, and build social skills through grounding, practice, and training.

• Thought Patterns and Mindset

Learn to challenge your negative thoughts and question the anxious thoughts, without fearing the outcomes of your performances. Aim for small, achievable goals (such as making eye contact or sitting near people).

• Behavioural Approach

Slowly start to engage in situations that you fear, and work to start a conversation, maybe in role playing, listen, and keep your body language comfortable. From one-to-one conversations, move to smaller groups you’re comfortable with and support groups to practice conversations in safe environments.

Engage in activities and hobbies you cherish to build self-esteem and manage anxiety.

• Practice Coping Strategies

Practice deep breathing: inhale for 3 seconds, hold for 3 seconds, and exhale slowly through your mouth for 3 seconds to relax your muscles. Focus on the present situation and your sense of practice grounding.

• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) involves changing the way you think about a situation, which helps modify behaviour. For people with social anxiety, you need to identify patterns of negative thoughts that make you avoid social situations, for instance, if you always expect the worst outcomes, or you think another person might see you blushing or sweating.

Your therapist can help you learn to channel your thoughts and negative expectations into positive, constructive self-talk, rather than negative self-talk.

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• Shift Focus on Others

When you’re in a social situation that’s getting on your nerves, most of us give in to our feelings and anxiety. You often think everyone is judging you and thinking negatively about you. Your focus shifts to your bodily sensations, which makes you more anxious. It prevents you from focusing on the conversations around you, and it affects your public performance.

Shift your focus from internal to external. Instead of your feelings, begin to concentrate on what is happening around you. Focus on what other people are doing, and don’t think that your anxiety is visible to them, because it usually isn’t. Other performers might be as nervous as you are, and nobody will think badly about you for feeling social anxiety.

• Learn Social Skills

Take social skills or assertiveness training classes offered at community centres and local adult education centres around you. You can take part in volunteer activities like putting up campaign posters, walking shelter dogs, or helping rescue workers on shore.

No matter how nervous or awkward you feel around others, learn to silence self-critical thoughts and boost your self-esteem.

• Adopt a Healthy Lifestyle

Your mind and body have an intrinsic connection; the way we treat our bodies has a significant effect on our anxiety levels.

Make lifestyle changes, such as stress-reducing activities like a healthy diet, yoga, and regular exercise. Limit or avoid your caffeine intake, including coffee, energy drinks, and soda, as they are stimulants for increased anxiety symptoms. Add more omega-3-rich foods to your diet, such as fish, walnuts, and flaxseeds, which can improve your mood and help manage anxiety.

Avoid alcohol consumption, quit smoking, and get quality sleep with the rule of early to bed and early to rise.

Is Social Anxiety a Disability?

Anxiety disorders are considered a disability in Canada, especially if they have a significant impact on your ability to function in daily life or perform basic activities (going to college/ or working in an office).

As per the Canadian Human Rights Act, anxiety disorders are considered a disability, which entitles individuals to protection from discrimination and provides access to safe and reasonable workplace accommodations. Employers have to provide adjustable work schedules, environments, and duties to people with anxiety disorders.

However, the eligibility isn’t just based on a basic diagnosis of anxiety; in fact, you need to demonstrate that your condition severely impacts your ability to work. It also requires medical history, mental status examination, psychological testing, personal and family statements, and a social worker statement.

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Final Words

Social anxiety isn’t just a phase that you can get over in a few days or weeks. It can last for years, hinder your activities and lifestyle, and affect your daily life. Boomerang Counselling Centre can help you work through social anxiety, guide you with CBT techniques, build social skills, and learn assertiveness to overcome social anxiety.